That’s right. They’re words. “Bad” words. Why are they “bad”? What did they do to deserve this status, this separation from the accepted, the norm? I have no idea, but I know how they taste. They taste like soap.

 

Language is fluid, ever-changing. Some changes are in response to new concepts or new discoveries. Certain psychological disorders didn’t always have names, just like words like “Internet” aren’t inherent to the things they describe. Seeing these “new” words being translated to other languages is even more interesting. Some changes in language occur from local colloquialisms, of which my Southern grandma is chock-full of, confusingly so. (Alternate naming conventions like “ring-tail tooter”, for example, can only be referring to raccoons unless I’m proven otherwise.) Some changes are adopted for the sake of brevity, or the need to be different, more are made for specificity, of necessity. I have no idea if it is true that the Inuit need 15 words for describing different types of snow but I’m not going to question it. Texas has no such need. Some changes arise when a word’s tense is unpopular, like the correct form of “sneaked” instead of “snuck”, “hanged” instead of “hung” in some cases. Some changes in language are developed over time, unknowingly, adaptations caused by miscommunication or misunderstanding. The modern-day, instant communication between different countries, cultures, and peoples of various speech patterns makes this one even more possible. Spelling can change even if the pronunciation sounds similar, as evidenced by the unfinished Canterbury Tales in their original “ye Olde English”. The vice-versa of this example can even occur, words like “about” being handled in humorous ways by the United States’ neighbor to the north…. eh? Homophones confuse/frustrate people to no end, and some are using they’re “text speak” in there term papers. O RLY?

So why are there “bad” words? Nearly everyone uses them and even more have heard of them, maybe even think them on a daily basis. If language is fluid, changing, it makes one wonder the history and the breadth of what was once designated as a “bad” word, but isn’t any longer. There are currently 7,000 active languages in the world, currently, even more than that having died out in the history of mankind….

Mouth sounds. That’s all our human speech is. If I hold my tongue against my teeth just so, while forcing air through my esophagus while flapping my lips, I produce mouth sounds. This is the basis for whistling, of which you have different octaves and frequencies. Makes you wonder how the “wolf call” whistle managed to find offense amongst women walking past a construction site. And don’t get me started on hand gestures!

Ah, the “meaning” of words. A tricky subject in and of itself. So the interpretation of the sounds is important in tandem, but separately, with the intention. You can’t just moan a string of syllables maliciously and have someone take offense (the way I interpret anything barked in the German language). The person, apparently, has to understand the “bad” word as well.

In addition to this, the actual meaning of the word doesn’t seem to play as big of a factor since substitutes exist. “Poo-poo” is funny, whereas “shit” is an adult word, a curse word. “Curse” word? As in voo-doo babbling, I put a spell on you, sacrifices, ill-omens and that manner? That type of curse? Hell, even “hell” is a super-charged word bordering on the dreaded “expletive”, but you won’t get total agreement on that. Even my own mother forbade me to say it up until a certain time period, from which I never received resistance since.

The mere mention of the “bad” word is even offensive to some, even when it is directed at nothing. We all have a form of Tourette’s in this manner, the word “fuck” being muttered under one’s breath too many times to count. It’s a reflexive impulse to my generation, so your mileage may vary. All manner of single-syllable expletives are used in such a knee-jerk manner, sometimes unconsciously, sometimes in a moment of sheer personal stupidity, frustration, or pain. (Similar to how I say “Ow” to myself sometimes when I’m merely surprised, not hurt.) It just happens. The inane usages of certain curse words is innumerable. Besides being used from everything between nouns (I don’t give a Damn), to verbs (Damn you), and a state of being (They’re Damned), they also exist as placeholders in speech. It’s best not to focus too much on individual ticks of those around you (trust me), but you may notice a certain phrase, twitch, or mouth sound while a person is thinking or unconsciously biding time until a thought occurs. Just like “um”, “uh”, and the infamous “like”, curse words have their place amongst these benign phrasings.

You hear “bad” words in the schoolyard, at work, particularly among certain circles of friends, crass website blogs, and so forth…. but I still can’t determine exactly why they are offensive. I played a little game back in the day when I was learning to speak and write. I used to take some random syllable, then go through the Alphabet replacing the first letter with the corresponding vowel or consonant: Aick, Bick, Cick, Dick…. I didn’t get very far. My best friend ratted me out and I got scolded. “We don’t say that word.” Bullshit. You adults all say that word, but you don’t want the kids to use it. Furthermore, Dick is a common name (short for Richard which makes even less sense). How can the innocence of a child’s mouth sound equate to “bad”? Gaga googoo. Caca? Spanish speakers were with you until “caca”.  I have no idea how all of this works. Then, of course, there is the childhood loophole of using “dam” the noun instead of “damn” the curse word. The lawyer mitigation regarding the repercussions of this action is still in session.

Just like currency, words are meaningless without the general acceptance of them. Little slips of paper and coin mean nothing, just like the crap that comes out of people’s mouths don’t either. It’s the general belief in these things that gives them power. If we, a conscious people, can turn a word originally meaning “happy” and an alternate spelling of a pronunciation meaning “bundle of sticks” into words synonymous with homosexuality, then we later convert those same words into harmless impulse declarations uttered by teens everywhere meaning “lame” or “ineffective”, then we can do the same with anything else. I declare that from this moment on, the word “transportation” means to place a scoop of strawberry ice cream onto a Dachsund’s head. Not the words “transport” or “transporting”, that would be just plain silly. “Transportation” now means this. If enough people agreed with me, then this absurdity would come true, and would even become second nature to a language given enough time. Look up an internet meme database if you don’t believe me.

So…. If we have determined that recipient understanding of a curse word is key (since one can’t offend one’s own self), that intention behind the usage is sometimes negligible, that context of the mouth sound along with the actual spelling of the spoken word is taken into consideration, that the official list of what is actually considered a curse word has not reached a concensus, that everyone who speaks the language is aware of the words if not being active users, that the sounds themselves derive power only from what the recipient bestows on them…. considering all of this, we can ultimately conclude that I will say whatever I damn well please and we are all the more perplexed than when I started this article.

And for the record, there are no “bad” words in the title. You can’t pronounce asterisks.