Call me an idiot [pause], but I took The New Yorker columnist Andy Borowitz literally when his article mentioned the mutual agreement to forever separate Putin and Obama. “It just CAN’T be true,” I thought, my discernible expectations for politicians disintegrating even further in a search for contrary evidence. It made sense in a senseless way, Obama being a silver-tongued upstart and Putin being the rugged, bear-wrestling, judo master who lost his smile in The Great Emotional Purge of ’52. Plus, “Barry O” only has a couple years left. It’s completely do-able.

Finally, after proof eluded me on the YouTubes, TYT, CNN, and other “legit” sources, I began investigating Borowitz, himself, suddenly realizing that the other blurbs in his repertoire tended to be more overt and indisputedly false. (The Wikipedia article labels him as one of them thar “comedians”.) Sucks that so many bloggers reference The New Yorker‘s satirist in their own writings, because it would be too easy for someone to quote multiple sources of this “story” and believe it as God-ordained fact.

Would it be too difficult for a “trustworthy” news source to require disclaimers at the end of each article? A single word like “PSYCHE!” or “GOTCHA!” would have saved me hours. (“The news, reshuffled.” is a terrible tag-line to indicate satire by the way.)

Screw your tongue-in-cheek-elitist-snobbery you long-necked, monacled asshole. I shouldn’t have to perform a full background check on your employees. What’s more, [surprisingly?] I even like bitter political humor…. but label it better for fackt’s sake!

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2012/07/shocker-the-new-yorker-acquires-the-borowitz-report.html (Borowitz agrees that he just doesn’t belong.)